Body art

What gender is 'computer' ?

A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that inSpanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine. "House" for instance, is feminine: "la casa." "Pencil," however, is masculine: "el lapiz."

A student asked, "What gender is 'computer'?"
Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the classinto two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselveswhether "computer" should be a masculine or a feminine noun.

Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.
The men's group decided that "computer" should definitely be of the feminine gender ("la computadora"),
because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and
   
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ("el computador"), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and
   
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model

Now decide :P

10 Reason To Buy A New Car

10. Your passenger seat is on the National Register of Historic Places.

9. Instead of an airbag, there's a whoopie cushion taped to your steering wheel.

8. You lose the stop-light challenge to a 14-year old on a moped.

7. 15-Minute Jiffy Lube needs to keep your car 3 days.

6. Thieves repeatedly break into your car just to take "The Club."

5. When you gas up, the attendant asks "Can I re-duct-tape that windshield for you?"

4. While waiting at a stop light, people run up asking if anyone was hurt.

3. For some unexplained reason, you keep losing dates on left turns.

2. Your gas gauge measures in cubits.

1. Traffic reporters starting to refer to you by name when discussing morning tie-ups.

10 things you didn't know about Death

1. When a person dies, hearing is the last sense to go -- the first is usually sight, followed by taste, smell and touch

2. A human head remains conscious for about 15 to 20 seconds after it has been decapitated

3. 100 people choke to death on pens each year. One is more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a spider

4. Alexander's funeral would have cost $600 million today. A road from Egypt to Babylon was built to carry his body

5. When inventor Thomas Edison died in 1931, his friend Henry Ford captured his last dying breath in a bottle

6. Over 2500 left-handed people are killed each year from using products made for right-handed people

7. It takes longer than ever before a body to decompose due to preservatives in the food that we eat these days

8. An eternal flame lamp at the tomb of a Buddhist priest in Nara, Japan has kept burning for 1,130 years

9. Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry is the first person to have his ashes put aboard a rocket and 'buried' in space

10. Japanese factory worker Kenji Urada became the first know fatality caused by a robot in July, 1981, in a car plant.